Blowjob and Attitude

If you want to know how to give your partner the most amazing blowjob he's ever had, then just know it's all about attitude - love it and enjoy it!

In the first two chapters of this blowjob guide, we talked about timing and location - two things quite external to what's happening between the two of you. In the third chapter, we talked about the psychology of a blowjob and his internal perception of a blowjob. These three things don't change the physical sensation of your mouth on his cock but just like your attitude, they can strongly affect how he will feel while you're giving him a blowjob.

The reason attitude is the most important part of great head is because a bad attitude is the easiest way to ruin a blowjob. Even worse than too much teeth, guys will tell you the worst blowjobs they've ever had are the ones where their partner wasn't enthusiastic about what she was doing.

Enthusiasm

Enthusiasm while giving head is the easiest and most effective way to increase your partner's perceived pleasure.

Why? Because when you're sucking cock when you don't want to be, he's going to pick up on it. A lack of enthusiasm is the most cited reason for a bad blowjob.

Giving a blowjob with enthusiasm means showing him you want to be doing it. If you don't want to be doing it, then don't! Any time you take his cock in your mouth - do it of your own volition, love doing it, and be sure he sees that! If you can do that, then you're already giving better head than most people out there.

How to Enjoy Giving Head

Guys say it again and again. From around the internet:

The key to good blowjobs is enthusiasm and communication.

Act like you want him.

Again, be enthusiastic.

If you're acting like you'd rather be doing something else, he's going to catch on.

Also, be enthusiastic.

It's easy to be enthusiastic about something you enjoy, but how can you enjoy giving head?

Tip 1: Be Good At It

Generally, we all tend to enjoy things we are good at because it seems easy to us. No one enjoys doing things that are difficult. So the trick to enjoying giving head is to be good at it - make it something that is easy to you.

OK, easier said than done. But if there's no real problem like a stinky penis or a guy who thinks blowjob means pushing your head down until you choke, practice can make giving a blowjob easier and easier until it's something you really enjoy doing because you are so good at it!

Tip 2: Find a Balance

Another thing that makes giving head a horrible chore is a feckless cunnilinguist. It's so much easier to enjoy giving head if your partner goes down on you too. Do to others as you would have them do to you. Each of you should: keep clean; give generously; and be gracious in receiving oral pleasure. It's very easy to enjoy giving head when you are doing it to say thank you for bringing you to orgasm.

If your partner isn't as generous as you, you are allowed to encourage him. Some guys think a quick lick is enough and too soon move to penetrative sex. If you suffer from an unknowingly thoughtless lover, it's perfectly ok, even sexy (nothing is sexier than a sexually confident woman), for you to ask him to keep going if you feel him pull away after less than a minute, especially if you typically spend much more time orally pleasuring him.

Tip 3: Be Horny

It's really easy to keep a balance if you both go down on each other every time. If he goes down on you first, it can help make the idea of sucking cock a much more pleasant prospect.

Personally, if we're taking turns, I prefer to suck him first. Even though there's no physical pleasure for me, the act is arousing and it makes receiving oral much better for me. If he goes down on me before I'm ready, he has to be much more careful and start a lot slower before my sensitive clit is happy to play.

However you get there, the point is giving head is so much better if you're already turned on.

If You Hate Giving Head

If you hate giving head... don't worry. You don't have to love it. You don't even have to do it. And, you're not alone. There are a lot of women who don't like giving head. Here's a list of common complaints and solutions.

But to me, one of the saddest reasons to dislike giving a blowjob is because your partner is a selfish recipient. To this I say: Be strong and be confident. At any time your partner's actions cause you to feel uncomfortable you must speak up. Object to disrespectful behavior. Stop at any time.

Giving a blowjob with a generous, loving attitude is so important that I always say if you're not enjoying it, don't do it. Giving a blowjob while hating it translates to the worst blowjob he's ever had so just never go that road.

How to Show Enthusiasm

Eye Contact

You can use eye contact to convey that your enthusiasm and enjoyment is sincere. Occasionally looking him directly in the eyes with a mouth full of cock and a smile shows you are truly enjoying it. In addition, making eye contact demonstrates confidence which is sexy, while simultaneously letting you gauge how much he is enjoying your skills.

Scenario

Imagine it now. Imagine his cock in front of you. Look up into his eyes and with your saliva-slick tongue, lick the underside of his cock-head. Take a longer lick up his shaft. Now, still looking at him, take him into your mouth. That is sexy.

It's sexy because it shows confidence. And it's intimate. And it will knock his socks off. Now, to add the cherry on top, close your eyes dreamily and lose yourself in the pleasure of sucking his cock (because sexy, confident eye contact can quickly become a weird serial-killer stare).

More on Eye Contact

Consider this: when you're talking to someone, it is important to look them in the eye. Not the whole time, but a decent amount of eye contact is important. Communication is a two way street - reactions and responses are a big part of good communication. We also use more than just our voices. Eye contact is an important example of this, but we also use gestures, touch, facial expressions, body language, and more.

A blowjob is a type of communication between lovers. Obviously communication in the form of a blowjob focuses on touch, but for the best communication - and for the best blowjob, employ all your other communication skills too!

Make it Visual

Making a blowjob visually entertaining takes a lot of confidence. And a lot of us are shy about how we might look doing this lewd thing with our mouths and their cocks. But this kind of enthusiasm pays dividends.

An unenthusiastic blowjob is the biggest complaint from guys about why blowjobs go bad. If you're hiding while giving him head - sticking with the prudent but monotonous head-bob for the duration of the blowjob, it's about as far from showing enthusiastic love for sucking cock as you can get. Let your tongue travel, from the tip of his cock to the taint (or beyond), and let him see - this shows him visually your enthusiasm.

It's no secret that sexually, guys are visually oriented creatures.They love to watch you suck, lick, nibble. Let him see you; his cock; and most importantly your enjoyment. Don't hide.

Show Him You Love It

So you know how to give head? Don't be shy about it - show him you aren't scared of his penis, that in fact you love it!

Enthusiasm is the secret to great head and according to a lot of guys, if there's such a thing as a bad blowjob, it's one lacking enthusiasm. Who wants anything given grudgingly?

You'll be giving your best blowjobs when you're good at it and are horny simply because this is when you'll be enjoying it and be enthusiastic about it. When you also feel sexually fulfilled by your partner, that's the trifecta!

An easy way to show enthusiasm is by initiating a blowjob.

A man doesn't want you just giving him a blowjob out of duty. In fact, the exact opposite of that - you willingly giving him head out of love, and actually enjoying it - is the gold standard of fellatio. Enthusiasm wins over any trick.

Love It!, Love It!, Love It! - All you need to know for the best blowjobs - the rest will follow.