Question
How can I get my confidence back after my boyfriend rejected my blowjob? I've been with my boyfriend for a year now and only given him a blow job once. I used to hate giving them but I learnt to like them before we were together, I was even praised for them. The one time I did it he stopped me all of a sudden, I felt very rejected so I have not done it again. He says the reason was because we had had sex various times that day and he got frustrated. Can this be true? How can I shake this feeling of rejection and be confident in my skills again? I want to do it again but I don't know how anymore, I feel too ashamed.
Answer
So your boyfriend stopped you in the middle of a blowjob and you feel like this was the ultimate rejection of your ability to give great head. I have to admit that would shake my confidence too.
But I'm also reading that you have had some great compliments in the past and am guessing you are probably pretty good at giving a blowjob. But the thing about great head is that it is a two way street. If the person giving the blowjob isn't enjoying themself, the guy getting the blowjob isn't going to enjoy it as much either. The opposite is also true and is what's happening with you - if the guy getting the blowjob isn't so into it, how can you enjoy giving him head. And the worst thing of all is that if you aren't enjoying it, your're going to give a terrible blowjob! It's a vicious cycle.
So, how can you get your mojo back? Well, the first thing is to figure out what went wrong in the first place. If it is as you say he says it is, then perhaps it was just a simple case of too much sex in one day. It can happen. Either a libido mismathc or I'm wondering if his stopping you was to get away from the fact (that maybe) he was going soft - which happens to a guy if they have too much sex. The penis stops working properly. So in that case, it's no one's fault, he was just trying to avoid the shame of having a Mr. Limpy. Unfortunately this isn't an easy thing for a guy to admit and so his stopping you made a mess, relationship wise. Perhaps.
Anyway, regardless of why he stopped you, the next thing is to just get back in the game. After you check with him first of course. See if he wants you to do it for him, then just do what you do. But maybe start slow and try to pick up on what he likes and doesn't like. Not all guys like the same techniques but as long as you connect and have fun with him while you both enjoy the act you taking his cock in your mouth, it should be a good time. You might have to learn the way he likes blowjobs (which may be different to what they other guy or guys liked).
The last thing I want to say is that every couple goes through these downs. It's part of the process. Something goes wrong but you both work to figure it out and fix it and hopefully, you both learn. You think this might just be money or chores, but this breakdown can happen in the bedroom too and it can surprise you both. Talk about it. Try again. And get your blowjob mojo back!
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